An Englishman abroad

If you've arrived here from abroad, cleared customs with your cheaper booze and fags and are ready for us Brits, this one is for you...

J'ai ’t’ tr’s ’tonn’ et satisfait par les nombres de liens ’, et des commentaires au sujet et sur de cet emplacement par des visiteurs de l'ext’rieur du monde d'expression anglaise. Je suis heureux que vous trouviez mes articles int’resser et j'esp’re que vous continuerez ’ revenir et visiter. (mes excuses si cette traduction est des pauvres, mais nous l'anglais ne supposons jamais que tout le monde peut, ou veut ’, parlent notre langue.)

Ich bin sehr durch die Zahlen Verbindungen zu und die Anmerkungen ’ber und zu diesem Aufstellungsort durch Besucher au’erhalb von der englischsprechenden Welt ’berrascht worden und gefallen worden. Ich bin erfreut, da’ Sie meine Artikel finden zu interessieren und ich hoffe, da’ Sie fortfahren zur’ckzukommen und zu besuchen. (meine Entschuldigungen, wenn diese ’bersetzung Armen ist, aber wir Englisch nie annehmen, da’ jeder kann oder zu w’nscht, sprechen unsere Sprache.)

Muy he sido sorprendido y satisfecho por los n’meros de acoplamientos a, y los comentarios sobre y sobre este sitio de los visitantes fuera del mundo de discurso ingl’s. Estoy contento que usted encuentra mis art’culos el interesar y espero que usted contin’e volvi’ndose y visitando. (mis apolog’as si esta traducci’n es los pobres, pero ingl’s nunca asumimos que todos puede, o desea a, hablan nuestra lengua.)

Molto sono stato sorprendo e soddisfatto stato dai numeri di collegamenti a e dalle osservazioni circa e su questo luogo dagli ospiti dall'esterno del mondo anglofono. Sono pleased che scoprite che i miei articoli interessano e spero che continuiate a ritornare e visitare. (le mie scuse se questa traduzione ’ poor, ma inglese non supponiamo mai che ognuno pu’, o desidera a, parlano la nostra lingua.)

Replies

1. #1 On July 3, 2004 07:35 AM Richard@Home said:

   I was under the impression that when one is speaking to Jonny foreigner, one should just shout slowly, in english. ;-) Pointing at random things helps too.

   By the way - the comparative translations by babel fish ( https://babel.altavista.com/babelfish/ ) made for intesting reading. Spanish prooving to produce the most readable version, imo.

2. #2 On July 3, 2004 11:11 AM Matthias Viehweger said:

   I'm from germany, but this computer-translation is much more difficult to read than "real" english.

   If I translate everything, one word at a time, back to english and tweak the grammar a bit, I think I know what you mean. I truly hope that the other version are easier to read...

   Richard: Simple english will be understood in the most of europe, nowadays. TV, radio and newspapers adopt more and more english words. Until now, there are more german words in a newspaper but this is only a question of time, I think.

3. #3 On July 3, 2004 11:50 AM Tommy said:

   I used to try to speak the language of the country I was visiting, but then I discovered that virtually everyone there spoke English better than I spoke French, Spanish, Italian or whatever, so it was a little pointless. And embarrassing, when I spent 10 minutes trying to remember how to say something, finally stuttering out an approximation, and the other guy just asked me, in perfect English, if I'd rather speak my own language...

4. #4 On July 3, 2004 12:46 PM Ruben said:

   Ik snap nauwelijks iets van je verhaal. Misschien kun je - ook gezien de commentaren hierboven - je voortaan toch beter tot Engels beperken.

   Or as Babelfish puts it: I get hardly something of your tale. Perhaps you - also seen the comments above - can as of now nevertheless improve you to English to restrict.

5. #5 On July 3, 2004 03:43 PM Malarkey said:

   Interesting, thanks guys.

   I can 'do' a bit of tourist French and I've been wanting to learn more Russian (a very cool language, saying even the simplest words makes you sound like a James Bond villain).

   What I was trying to say was, I am surprised and pleased by all the referrers and comments from kind people outside of the 'English speaking world'...

   Maybe I should stick to writing in English if the Google translations are so poor. (Although my wife often says that I haven't mastered English too well either ;) )

6. #6 On July 3, 2004 05:22 PM Gordon Mackay said:

   You left out the Gaelic version :( hehe

7. #7 On July 3, 2004 05:31 PM Huw said:

   I'm wondering, do you speak any Welsh, given that you live and work in Wales?

8. #8 On July 3, 2004 06:17 PM Colly said:

   Let's test your character encoding here...

   St’r ’’kk s’ allur the ’slendingur hver hafa me’ ’v’ skilyr’i hlekkur til CollyLogic. ’’ ert mj’g , mj’g ’g’tur f’lk , og ’G ’st ’inn f’’a. og st’lka.

   That's for all the Icelanders linking to my site. Lovely people...

9. #9 On July 3, 2004 07:32 PM Mat’as said:

   Automated translations are really bad. They will convey the idea if the ones who reads it knows a tiny bit of what you're trying to say.

   I speak Spanish ans English good enough so as not to have any kind of trouble communicating wiht anyone. All the same, I'd rather learn other languajes if I'm to speak them.

   But in my blog, I use my own languaje 'cause it's MY blog. I know that making it in English would make it available to a lot of people but, at the same time, would make it unreadable to some people I know that don't understand English.

10. #10 On July 3, 2004 08:01 PM Malarkey said:

    @ Huw: I know enough Welsh to phone the Cmyraeg number for HSBC to get put through to my local branch, rather than a call centre somewhere east of Alpha Centauri.

    @ Gordon: I know what your 'oxters' are. Will that do?

    @ Colly: Nice new article mate. Doing an Icelandic translation? ;)

    @ Everyone: Enough already... I won't use Google Translate or Babel Fish EVER again. If anyone fancies volunteering to translate in future, let me know.

11. #11 On July 5, 2004 08:34 AM Tommy Olsson said:

    Och varf’r utel’mnade du den svenska ’vers’ttningen, om jag f’r fr’ga? Jag k’nner mig synnerligen diskriminerad! ;)

12. #12 On July 5, 2004 10:51 AM solaria said:

    Hi, spanish translation is not understadable either :-P with the "acoplamiento" bit, it becomes quite erotic also ;-)

    "Estoy muy sorprendido y satisfecho por el n’mero de enlaces a este sitio as’ como por los comentarios de visitantes de habla no inglesa. Estoy encantado de que encuentren mis art’culos interesantes y espero que contin’e visit’ndonos. Mis disculpas si ’sta es una traducci’n pobre, pero nosotros los ingleses nunca suponemos que los dem’s habla o desea hablar nuestra lengua"

    ;-)

13. #13 On July 5, 2004 11:40 AM Pete Smith said:

    Did you consider translating the content for areas of the UK?

    I've found a Scouse, Yorkshire, Scotish, Geordie, Jolly Well spoken, Irish and Brummie translator so far.

    There is also an Ali G one out there!!! Ayyyeeeeeee!!!

14. #14 On July 5, 2004 05:56 PM Neko said:

    My humble Italian translation:

    "Sono piacevolmente sorpreso di scoprire tra i miei lettori persone che vivono in Paesi dove la madre lingua non ’ l'inglese. Sono contento di sapere che trovate i mie articoli interessanti e spero che continuerete a visitare il mio sito!"

    If you need to translate something in the future, feel free to contact me. ^_^

    ~Neko

15. #15 On July 6, 2004 01:28 PM Fishmonster said:

    One step down from language is of course I accent. I was born in hampshire but at age 13 moved to Edinburgh where I stayed for 20 years before moving back to Hampshire. I speak, for the most part, with a southern English accent, but when on the phone to Scotland, it's a fact that my accent changes to match the person I am speaking with. I used to worry about this but then I came to this conclusion;

    a) I couldn't do anything about it.
    b) It's polite as it helps the listener better understand what I am trying to say.

    I haven't tried it with European languages yet, but it definitely works with them there Yanks ;o)

16. #16 On July 27, 2004 04:43 PM mirko said:

    that was hilarious. If you speak italian like that I dont think people in here would understand.

    But yeah, I think that English native speakers tend to become lazy when it comes to languages, since they're own language is spoken nearly everywhere.

    BTW, if you want to speak the real Italian, you also have to move your hands a lot :-)