Malarkey is Andy Clarke, a creative designer with a passion for accessibility and web standards. This is his personal website.

Arno Zimmerman’s untold stories

It’s time to tell the remaining untold stories from Arno Zimmerman. Unfortunately not all of Arno’s attempts at domain name acquisition were successful, but thanks to everyone concerned for being great fun to play with.

Arno Zimmerman and the The Kartooner

Dear Mr. Sagen

My agency is currently engaged by a well-known Hollywood studio. The studio is producing a new action movie called The Kartooner. The movie has an all star cast, including Bruce Willis in the title role, and will be released in the fall. My client is therefore very keen to purchase the rights to the domain name kartooner.com from you.

Erik blew the gag wide open by immediately posting about Arno’s approach on his blog rather than reply to Arno directly. Still, lots of fun was to be had. Next up was that international heart-throb, Faruk Ates

Arno Zimmerman in Kura Fire

Dear Mr. Ates

My agency is currently engaged by a Japanese film studio. The studio is producing a new erotica/martial-arts crossover movie called Kura Fire, which loosely translated into English means ’He of the hot trousers’. The movie will be released straight to DVD in the autumn of this year . As you might imagine, the concept of a movie which covers both genres of erotica and martial-arts is sure to be a best seller. My client is therefore very keen to purchase the rights to the domain name kurafire.net from you.

I guess that Faruk was too canny a Dutchman to be fooled by that one. Let’s try an Australian.

Arno Zimmerman in The Man In Blue

Arno’s first approach

Dear Mr. Adams

My agency is currently engaged by well-known recording artist, Celine Dion who will soon be launching a new CD called The Man In Blue. Ms. Dion is therefore very keen to purchase the rights to the domain name themaninblue.com from you.

Cameron’s reply

Sorry, not for sale.

Arno tries once more

Dear Mr. Adams

Both myself and Ms. Dion are disappointed that you will not consider our acquisition of your domain name at this time. We wonder if your decision was based on the fact you are not a fan of Celine’s music?

I have therefore taken the liberty of sending you Celine’s complete back catalogue of CDs.

Funny, Cameron didn’t respond, I’m not sure why? Celine is one of Arno’s favourites.

All in all, a silly way to waste a few hours and a gMail address. I’m sure that this won’t be the last that we see of Arno. ;)

Replies

  1. #1 On April 20, 2006 10:04 AM Faruk Ateş said:

    If I would still post on any forums, I would so change my Custom Title to read "He of the hot trousers" after all this. :-)

    Well played though, Malarkey.

  2. #2 On April 20, 2006 01:26 PM Dave Scriven said:

    Who would have thought. No doubt the web community will have its eye on you now Malarkey.

    @Faruk - could you not find some space on your site for a new strapline? ;)

  3. #3 On April 20, 2006 03:39 PM Zak Wylde said:

    That dude on the latest T-Mobile commerical sure looks familiar huh……

  4. #4 On April 20, 2006 05:49 PM Jan Korbel said:

    Great prank, love it!
    Give thumbs up to Arno for me, please.

  5. #5 On April 22, 2006 04:43 AM Cameron Adams said:

    You’re a dead man Malarkey. Ya hear me!? A dead man!